Roxie’s Big Break: The Debutante Class

I am delighted to have joined this year’s group of debutantes — a truly talented, funny, and well rounded little troupe of ladies who will be putting together an exclusive show later on this year. I want to track some of the journey towards that show — the first time any of us will be performing publicly through this blog. But rather than listening to me talk about it, I thought I’d let Roxanne Ready speak to you directly.

A bit of an introduction to my persona: This aspiring starlet is, if nothing else, deeply earnest in her desire to please her audiences, ultimately hoping to win over their hearts and adoration. She is fairly certain she has what it takes to be THE NEXT BIG THING, but is constantly making mistakes along the way. Rolling with the punches, tripping over her own feet, but always maintaining her sunny smile, Roxanne is determined to make it all the way to the silver screen. As she is fond of telling people, her first big mistake in Hollywood was passing up on the role of Rosebud in Citizen Kane — but she’s no dummy, she won’t make the same mistake twice!

Now, an excerpt from Roxanne’s diary, regarding her first two weeks in the Debutante prep course.

September 30th 

Hello diary! Sorry for not writing in so long. I’ve been very busy with my FIRST BIG BREAK — the opportunity to debut (debute? debite? deboot?) as a stage performer at the Rosebud academy. The training for this position is intense! Myself and the other ladies have already had two gruelling classes under the very strict headmistress Cherripop Purr . I mean, she had us sit and brainstorm . We’ve had this talk before, diary. You know how me and Mr. Brain get along.

Anyway, in the first class we talked about ourselves (that part was easy) and what we wanted our pieces to look like (that part was hard). She sent us away with homework (groan. I didn’t drop out of highschool and enter showbiz so I could do homework, right?). But it wasn’t, like, maths. This homework involved collecting up “prototype” costume pieces (and I absolutely adore clothing, so no hardship there), coming up with music (not to give anything away, but I think I found a piece that is both elegant and gritty enough to showcase my range as an actress!), and being prepared to talk about ourselves and our performances some more (so right up my alley!). 

I am really enjoying listening to the ideas the other ladies are coming up with, and sharing feedback. Such beautiful gals, with creative minds. I wouldn’t want to perform alongside anything less. 

Next week, we begin practicing our movements. I’ve spent the week soaking in Epsom salts in preparation for what will no doubt be an exhausting strain on my delicate body. But anything on the road to fame and fortune, right?

I should probably get out of the bathtub now and clean the cat box. It smells as though Poof Poof took a poo poo!

Lots of love,


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